You Want to Say It…But Should You?

SCRIPTURE:

OBSERVATION:

Have you ever been in a situation where you really wanted to give your two cents? Maybe you knew more than someone and just felt the need to chime in. Maybe someone said something that just ticked you off and you wanted to clap back at them. Maybe they offended you and you really wanted them to know how much they hurt you.

We’ve all been in a situation where we’ve really wanted to say something. And more often than not, you probably had the right to say something. But whether or not our two cents are warranted, should we always speak up when we want to?

In Job 20, Job has just completed his sixth rebuttal to his friends who are trying to convince him that he is suffering because of sin. As we learned in the first two chapters of Job, Job suffers not because he is unrighteous, but because he is righteous. God allows him to be tormented by satan to serve as an example to the devil himself that mankind can continue to be faithful to God in the face of great evil. As Job continues to maintain his innocence and stand on his righteousness, his friends begin to turn on him.

Irritated that Job won’t back down from maintaining his innocence, rather than comfort his friend who has lost everything, Zophar begins to react to Job’s rebuttals. He accuses Job of being wicked, prideful, and enjoying evil. He implies to Job his prior prosperity was temporary because he achieved it through wrongdoing. And most of all, he continues to falsely accuse Job, telling him that his suffering was because of his wickedness. Is any of this true? No. Job was innocent from all of these claims, and Zophar is eventually made a fool for speaking up and sharing falsehoods. 

Why does Zophar make a fool of himself? Why does Zophar experience a catastrophic failure of his character and reputation? Because he listened to his feelings rather than the direction of God. As he says in verses 2 and 3:

1. “I must reply because I am greatly disturbed. (Job 20:2 NLT)

Zophar was offended. He took the bait of satan and let his offense create an urgency within him to respond. And the devil loves to operate in the rush. Zophar was so ticked off by Job's words that Zophar believes he has to say something, which cuts even deeper into his relationship with Job because just a few verses earlier, Job pleaded with his friends to have mercy on him. Job was asking for compassion, but Zophar wanted correction. And from Zophar’s poor performance, we are reminded that just because we feel like we need to say something doesn’t mean we should.

2. “I’ve had to endure your insults…” (Job 20:3a NLT)

Zophar felt personally attacked. Instead of listening to Job’s pain, Zophar listened to his own pain. So rather than controlling himself, Zophar loses self-control and lets his emotions control him. When we let our emotions control ourselves, we say things we regret saying, do things we regret doing, and hurt others in the process. Why? Because being offended can make us more interested in proving our point than understanding the person in front of us.

3. “but now my spirit prompts me to reply.” (Job 20:3b NLT)

Zophar listened to his spirit; not The Spirit. This is where Zophar went wrong. Rather than pause and ask God whether he should speak up, he just listened to himself and went for it. In the NIV translation, this verse says “my understanding inspires me to reply.” Remember, in Zophar’s limited understanding, he was warranted in speaking up. The issue was that Zophar’s understanding was wrong. And because his understanding was wrong, the words that Zophar ends up speaking were wrong. When we lean on our limited understanding rather than God’s complete understanding, we will always be prone to making catastrophic mistakes. 

APPLICATION:

Just because you want to say something, feel like you need to say something, or are even warranted in saying something doesn’t mean you should. Because more often than not, you don’t know the whole story. And because you don't, your limited understanding may cause you to say or do things that you will later regret.

That is not to say that you should never speak up. Sometimes, God calls you to speak up. The key is knowing whether He wants you to speak up. So before you do, ask God if you should. A simple prayer saying “God, what do you want me to do?” is the easy remedy. If he says to speak, then speak up. But if he says to stay quiet, then shut up––because not all revelation is meant for you to share, and not all insight is meant to be given to everyone. Perhaps He gave you that revelation not to correct the other person, but to correct you in how you are to love them.

Sometimes the most spiritually mature response to something that bothers you isn't to immediately have an answer; it's listening long enough––to them and to God––to understand.

Don’t pull a Zophar. Don’t give your two cents just because you have them or clap back because you can. Ask God whether or not you should speak up, and listen to His direction, especially when you are emotionally charged. For a failure to follow the directions of God will always risk your reputation and lead to a catastrophic failure of your character.

PRAYER:

Holy Spirit,

Thank You for the gift of self-control. When I am in situations where I want to share my two cents or clap back out of emotions, help me to pause and turn my eyes to You. Give me the wisdom to discern what You want me to do and the heart to be able to see them as You see them. Empower me to do what is right and righteous. I love You, Lord. Thank You for loving me.

In Jesus’ name,

Amen