A gentle answer turns away wrath, But a harsh word stirs up anger.
Proverbs 15:1
Have the right heart when correcting. Whether you are a parent, teacher, leader, or coach, correcting bad behavior or poor performance is never easy. Hebrews 12:6 says, “For whom the Lord loves He disciplines.” If people know you care for them and they trust you, their hearts will be open to what you have to say. When people believe you have their best interest at heart, fear dissipates, walls go down, and you have a straight line to influence the heart.
Remember, when you are correcting someone, you are not only handling a problem; you are handling a person.
Correction is more art than science. While specifics can be boiled down to a multi-step approach, the A.R.T. of correction must be adapted to each person and set of circumstances. Your potential as a leader can skyrocket or sink based on your ability to help those around you to grow past their limitations. Here are a few simple steps to help you navigate the process of correcting poor perfor- mance and behavior.
THE A.R.T OF CORRECTION
Affirm your appreciation for them by acknowledging their strengths and contribution to the organization.
- Connect to the heart. People consider themselves and their contributions valuable, even sacred. Verbalize your confidence in them by acknowledging specific ways their contributions benefit the team.
- Speak to their talent sets and strengths you have observed in operation using specific examples. People don’t mind a little “buttering up” as long as it is sincere, meaningful, and from the heart.
Resist the temptation to communicate in anger or frustration; instead, correct in gentleness, confront with candor, and coach with clarity.
- Correct in gentleness. A meeting with a person in authority already carries a weight of heaviness and intimidation. For this reason, the leader may need to go the extra mile in disarming a defensive employee. Try to separate the person from the problem so you can speak to the issue while stewarding the heart that has been entrusted to you.
- Confront with candor. Addressing the issue head-on and not beating around the bush makes for a more productive meeting on a subject that is already difficult for the one being corrected. If you are not prepared with your talk track and the tone necessary to be effective, it is a form of emotional abuse to lead a person through a corridor of their failures or weaknesses without being able to close the meeting with them feeling as if a positive deposit in the relationship bank account has been made.
- Coach with clarity. Outline your expectations clearly, so the person being corrected knows where the goalposts are. It is disheartening to have a meeting with a supervisor where you walk away saying, “I don’t know what they want.” Communicate with specific examples of the behavior you’ve identified that needs changing while using examples, analogies, and simple metaphors for them to understand. It may be necessary to give examples of how the organization, culture, or people have been impacted by the behavior you are discussing.
Timeline and outline specific expectations, how progress will be measured, and reiterate your confidence in them to make the necessary improvements.
- Give the employee an opportunity to provide feedback, so they feel as if the discussion was collaborative and not dogmatic. Follow up on what was discussed and expected in writing with a memo that includes a “what, why, and by when.”
- Look for improvements over time to catch them doing something right and look for subtle changes they need to course correct. If you don’t follow up on the “meeting of correction,” they will doubt your sincerity or, worse, feel you have abandoned their growth.
- Be sure to encourage with confidence and affirmation regularly. Consistent encouragement and affirmation will counter-balance any relational withdrawals you’ve made as a leader.
REFLECT TO CONNECT
- What has been your experience in being corrected or having to correct another?
- What do you feel is the most important skill a leader must use when correcting behavior?
- What advice would you give to the leaders in your circle about correcting performance and behavior?
Your potential as a leader can skyrocket or sink based on your ability to help those around you to grow past their limitations.
